Missing Muse

O propheta, certe penis tuus cælum versus erectus est.

—

Ali, commenting on the death of Mohammad, via Abulfeda, via Edward Gibbon’s Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, via Wikipedia: Death erection, via today’s edition of “Office banter we’d never get away with if we had an HR department”.

[trans: “O prophet, thy penis is erect unto the sky”]

(via langer)

This conversation came out of the discussion of how to make the big bucket of cashews that we appropriated today warm, as consuming warm nuts is much preferred to consuming room temperature nuts.

Mr. Langer lamented on the frigid state of the nuts he was putting in his mouth. As a remedy I beseeched him to cut large, billowing swaths through the sack of nuts with his turgid member to improve the particle speed deficiency that the nuts were currently experiencing.

Mr. M. Kurlancheek then inquired as to my reasoning for said solution for the temperature deprivation and quickly resolved that it was due to the fact that an erect male genitalia is always warm.

I was quick to answer this statement with musings about post-mortem erections and their ability to be of an undesirable temperature for nut warmth creation, which promptly led me to google for “post death boner.” Mr. Langer then questioned the efficacy of such a search and I replaced “boner” with the correct term, “hard dick.”

Through the magic of the Lord Google I was led to the article on “Angel Lust” and it’s interesting history.